Miscellaneous Forum

1) This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles.
(Kelly age 6)

2) Oysters' balls are called pearls.
(James age 6)

3) If you are surrounded by sea you are an Island. If you don't have sea all round you, you are incontinent.
(Wayne age 7)

4) Sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like Emily Richardson. She's not my friend no more.
(Kylie age 6)

5) A dolphin breaths through an arsehole on the top of its head.
(Billy age 8)

6) My dad goes out in his boat, and comes back with crabs. (Emily Burniston age 5)

7) When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross the ocean. Sometimes, when the wind didn't blow, the sailors would whistle to make the wind come. My brother said they would be better off eating beans.
(William age 7)

8) I like mermaids. They are beautiful, and I like their shiny tails. How do mermaids get pregnant?
(Helen age 6)

9) I'm not going to write about the sea. My baby brother is always screaming and being sick, my Dad keeps shouting at my Mum, and my big sister has just got pregnant, so I can't think what to write.
(Amy age 6)

10) Some fish are dangerous. Jellyfish can sting Electric eels can give you a shock. They have to live in caves under the sea where I think they have to plug themselves into chargers.
(Christopher age 7)

11) When you go swimming in the sea, it is very cold, and it makes my willy small.
(Kevin age 6)

12) Divers have to be safe when they go under the water. Two divers can't go down alone, so they have to go down on each other.
(Becky age 8)

13) On holiday my Mum went water skiing. She fell off when she was going very fast. She says she won't do it again because water shot up her fanny (Julie age 7).

Thanks - ha ha!! I had a great laugh. Definitely needed that. Kids are great!

Loved it! Kids say the darndest things!
Is that your boat? Wow!

This is hilarious! Thanks for posting, I needed a laugh.

C

Only under very minute circumstances Gail

Griff, have you heard the mermaid song from Great Big Sea?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=96MQ1OQupxc

Except for #9 had a great giggle. Many thanks. That one [9] was a heart breaker though...

Do these children know that everybody is laughing about them? That must make them feel extremely stupid and embarrassed.

I need something to make me feel better, and these are priceless.

Hahaha! That reminds me of my Aussie friend's daughter (who was 6 at the time and hadn't talked to many people from outside Australia) who once told me "you talk like Spongebob Squarepants"